I clicked on this article thinking it would read as if my first husband's mistress had written it. I was hoping to discover why she had believed the lies a married man had told her, how she felt when he left her for someone else, and how she justified the destruction of a marriage when her first one had been destroyed the same way.
I agree with the other responders. I think it would serve you well to figure out why you believed this married man's lies. His wife was lucky she knew about it. I didn't.
His wife was no doubt home alone, trying to raise his kids, probably getting hurt. What he told you about her was a lie. If she's still with him, he has injured her so deeply that she feels unable to leave.
In my eyes, there is no excuse for someone who willingly believes the lies of a dangerous person. I think that's the direction your healing journey should lead you.